Patrick Slattery Recovery May 17, 2023 Communication is an essential aspect of recovery and life in general. The act of communicating allows you to convey your thoughts, feelings, and emotions. However, not everyone communicates the same way, so understanding your communication style can be key to building healthy relationships in both personal and professional environments. This knowledge can greatly benefit you in sober living, as it helps to communicate your feelings and situation more efficiently. Understanding Communication Style Communication styles refer to the methods by which we express our words to others. They are often determined by factors such as personality, cultural background, and personal upbringing. There are four primary communication styles. While you may resonate with one more than the other, your communication style can change over time. #1. Passive Communication Style This communication style refers to individuals who avoid expressing their ideas and needs. This can quickly lead to feelings of resentment and frustration. These individuals tend to give in easily to others’ demands, stay out of conflict to the best of their ability, and rarely assert themselves. Benefits Passive communication can be great to help you stay out of conflict and prevent a situation from escalating. This personality type can help to maintain relationships and social stability as these individuals try to ensure others around them are happy. They may choose to avoid having discussions that spark disagreement, which can avoid tension within relationships. Limitations On the contrary, having a passive communication style can cause individuals to have a difficult time expressing themselves. If you fall into this communication style, you may find that you often feel misunderstood by others. You may also find that you have lower self-esteem and lack self-confidence. Passive communication can lead to feelings of resentment as feelings and opinions often seem to be ignored. #2. Aggressive Communication Style An aggressive communication style refers to individuals who use forceful, intimidating tactics. These individuals often use bullying tactics to obtain what they desire. They usually prioritize their needs above the needs of others. Their communication can be threatening, hostile, or even violent. Aggressive communication is often accomplished in a confrontational manner. Benefits One of the major benefits of engaging in aggressive communication is that you likely will get the results you are looking for. By being assertive, individuals may be able to convince others to comply with their specific requirements. Aggressive communication also carries a sense of confidence, potentially establishing authority within a situation. In a situation where immediate action is required, aggressive communication can be great for making hasty decisions and quickly resolving problems. Limitations Aggressive communication has the potential to isolate you from others and damage supportive relationships. It can tend to cause conflict and hurt those you care about if you do not utilize this form of communication effectively. You may find that people tend to avoid you if you consistently engage in this form of communication. #3. Passive-Aggressive Communication Style A passive-aggressive communication style refers to individuals who appear amiable on the outside but are hostile and resentful underneath. They typically employ subtle tactics like sarcasm, manipulation, or withholding information as a means of expressing their anger and frustration. Benefits If you have a passive-aggressive communication style, you likely tend to avoid confrontation. This can be useful in situations where you need to express your feelings but do not want to come across harshly. It can be a useful form of communication to express negative emotions or feelings of dissatisfaction without causing conflict. Limitations Despite these benefits, passive-aggressive communication can lead to misunderstandings and misinterpretations of what you are attempting to express. This can lead to damaged relationships if the information you are trying to convey is misinterpreted. Not fully being assertive in your communication may lead you to struggle fully address your needs. #4. Assertive Communication Style An assertive communication style refers to individuals who express their thoughts, opinions and needs with confidence and respect. They tend to be direct, honest, and open while considering others’ needs as well. This is ultimately the ideal form of communication in most situations, as it adheres to your boundaries while still respecting others around you. Benefits An assertive communication style has several advantages that can promote sustained recovery. Some of these benefits include: Improved self-esteem: An assertive communication style can help you develop a strong sense of self-worth and confidence. When you express yourself assertively, you are acknowledging your needs and beliefs, which in turn increases self-esteem while relieving feelings of insecurity. Improved relationships: An assertive communication style can help you foster healthy relationships based on mutual respect and understanding. When you communicate assertively, others are more likely to listen attentively, demonstrate empathy, and collaborate effectively with you. Increased boundaries: An assertive communication style can help you set healthy boundaries with others. Communicating assertively means setting clear expectations and limits, which reduces the chance of misunderstands, conflicts, or resentment. Reduced stress and anxiety: An assertive communication style can help you reduce stress and anxiety by allowing you to express yourself effectively. Communicating assertively increases the likelihood that you will feel heard and understood, which in turn reduces feelings of frustration or anger. Why Your Communication Style Matters Your communication style can have a significant effect on the quality of your relationships, both personally and professionally. If you tend to communicate in either an aggressive or passive manner, you may find it challenging to assert yourself and build healthy connections. On the contrary, assertive communication encourages open, honest, and respectful interactions. Communication is an essential factor in recovery from addiction or mental health disorders. Many individuals struggling with addiction or mental health disorders find it difficult to express their thoughts and feelings, which may hinder them from seeking assistance or receiving support. By understanding your communication style, you can learn how to express yourself more effectively, which will improve relationships as well as boost your recovery chances. Utilize your communication skills to improve your experience at Real Recovery Sober Living. Understanding your communication style and being aware of the impacts of your communication can be essential aspects of keeping your support system strong. This can often be beneficial in communicating with your family members, as it is easy to fall back into old communication habits with those we are close to. Finding support without family can be intimidating and add an extra level of stress to your sober living experience. Use communication to avoid this situation. Achieving an Assertive Communication Style Acquiring an assertive communication style takes practice. Utilizing these techniques can help you establish an assertive communication style and learn to balance the other forms of communication to utilize in specific moments. Recognize Your Communication Style The initial step to developing an assertive communication style is acknowledging your current one. Pay attention to how you speak with others and identify any patterns of behavior that could be passive, aggressive, or passive-aggressive. As your communication style may change over time, it is important to recognize the aspects that alter your way of communicating. Work to identify which communication you tend to fall into. Identify Your Needs and Beliefs Take some time to identify your needs, beliefs, and values so you can express yourself more effectively and confidently. By being clear about what you want and believe in, you’re more likely to communicate assertively. Altering your communication style does not require you to compromise your core values. It is essential to ensure you are still being who you are when finding your form of healthy communication. Practice Active Listening Active listening is an essential skill in effective communication. Paying attention to what others say, asking clarifying questions, and summarizing their points will help you gain a better understanding of their perspectives and needs, leading to more effective communication. Active listening can help strengthen your relationships with others as well and truly understand their needs. You also may be able to recognize some of your own needs through actively listening to others. Utilize “I” Statements “I” statements are an effective way to express yourself assertively without attacking or blaming others. By using these phrases, you take responsibility for your feelings and opinions without needing someone else to intervene. For example, instead of saying, “You never listen to me,” state something like, “I feel unheard when my ideas aren’t heard.” This takes away the aspect of blame while still reflecting your feelings. Practice Assertive Body Language Your body language can have a significant impact on how assertive you come across. Try to maintain eye contact, stand or sit up straight, and speak clearly and confidently. Avoid crossing your arms or legs, as this could indicate defensiveness or discomfort. The way our body is presented tends to reflect our current emotional state. If you practice assertive body language, your communication will come across this way more naturally. One essential aspect of assertive body language is being able to make eye contact. Eye contact signals that you are paying attention and taking their conversation seriously; it also conveys confidence and openness. Furthermore, using open and expansive gestures like uncrossing arms and legs and holding out arms slightly away from your body can make you seem more approachable and welcoming to others. Establish Boundaries Setting boundaries is an integral part of assertive communication. Be honest about your limits and expectations with others, then communicate them respectfully yet assertively. For instance, you could say to someone, “I need some alone time to recharge, so I won’t be attending the event this weekend.” This can be intimidating if you fall into a passive communication style, but it allows you to convey your emotions honestly. Practice makes perfect! Establishing assertive communication takes time and practice; start by practicing it in low-risk situations, such as conversations with friends or family members. As you become more comfortable using assertive language in these low-risk scenarios, you can apply it to more challenging ones. Utilize these techniques to become your best self through your sober living journey at Real Recovery. Recognizing your communication style is an essential step in achieving sustained recovery and maintaining healthy relationships. Passive, aggressive, and passive-aggressive approaches can lead to miscommunication, conflict, and resentment. Establishing a sense of assertive communication can help you express yourself effectively, build healthy connections, and reduce stress and anxiety levels. Understanding how you communicate with others can have a significant impact on your recovery journey. By learning and implementing an assertive communication style, you can improve your relationships, set healthy boundaries, and reduce stress and anxiety. Practice communicating effectively with those around you, and don’t be afraid to ask for help or guidance if needed. Start building healthy connections and improve your recovery journey today by prioritizing your communication skills at Real Recovery Sober Living. Discover your unique communication style and learn how to connect with others in a way that builds strong relationships and helps you achieve your goal. Contact Real Recovery Sober Living to learn more at (727) 290-9156. Men Recovery - Share on Facebook Share on twitter